Cheaters

[mcdonna]

So, it's Sunday here now, and it would seem the "party" was a success, so before I walk Mud, Moose and Obi Wan, I will play some boards, continue to not dump them, particularly because the letter V has returned!!!

Glad your V is back. Last year my Gs disappeared for a couple of weeks and now the letter after G is being coy. Sometimes I can type an H and oter times it takes several tries. Slows down te typing!

[flops]

oh, no! looks like your lower case h is being very s()y...maybe try some st johns wort....

[flops]

There are between 5 and 8 adults in my house (yaaay, our cartoon baby turned 18...(we had to wait 18 years for that), so I open a game, see I've set a record for it, and hey presto...the phone pings (generally an sms from three rooms away), or there is a plumbing emergency, or I JUST HAVE TO COME AND LOOK AT THIS MUM!, or they need refereeing....sigh...can't even beat myself!

[Naboka]

There are between 5 and 8 adults in my house (yaaay, our cartoon baby turned 18...(we had to wait 18 years for that), so I open a game, see I've set a record for it, and hey presto...the phone pings (generally an sms from three rooms away), or there is a plumbing emergency, or I JUST HAVE TO COME AND LOOK AT THIS MUM!, or they need refereeing....sigh...can't even beat myself!

18 years? The first year takes about two, the next two take one each, then in single year they're finished with grade school and onto middle and high school and those years take about 3 each mostly because all the eye rolls tend to slow the spin of the earth. So, it took us between 26 and 30 years to get respectively through the 18 with each of our kids. Clocks are just a trick we play on one another.

[bwt1213]

From my perspective (73, with two kids and two grandkids -- and the older one looking like he's getting really serious with someone and going to start grad school soon, so maybe another generation on the way and I'll be a great-grandfather) I have to say that NOW it feels like the kids spent about a week being each year, and the time between them going to school for the first time and the time they left the house for good seems like an eyeblink. But I can remember the second one having colic and screaming all night every night until her nose bled, and then not so much sleeping as passing out so she could wake up and start screaming again. Seven months of that, and there wasn't going to be a third child. So, yeah, back when I was 30 or so I probably would have told you the first seven months of that second child took thirty years off my life. I don't know if it was THAT much, but it was a load for both me and my wife and I'm surprised we're both still alive. I'm not joking. Both daughters are lovely women now, very successful, very intelligent, and I can be proud of each of them. But raising them wasn't cheap, and I'm not talking about money.

[Panache2]

This is headed up "cheaters", but all I see are complaints about raising kids. Sorry it was such a burden, and too bad you couldn't have gotten the very real enjoyment raising children provide.

[bwt1213]

Two things to note, here: (1) None of us said children were merely a burden and that there was no joy in it; and (2) children are a whole lot of work and sometimes it seems nearly impossible to survive. If you haven't yet encountered (2), you're lucky. I hope you stay lucky. Some people do.

[Panache2]

No, no one stated specifically raising kids was a burden, but read their descriptions of doing so and it's not difficult to feel that's how they felt. And, at age 84, my 27 year old is giving me a great deal of pleasure as he did from his moment of birth. My 53 and 5o year old sons were equally enjoyable to have around, problems, sickness and all the other work involved notwithstanding. I'm in perfect health, so these wonderful sons did nothing to shorten my life. So, guess I'm one of the lucky ones, by your standards.

[Naboka]

Socializing and making friends is a good thing.

Staying on topic? ...

Having a sense of humor certainly makes life easier.

Staying disciplined and on task has advantages, but some things are more important.

We all have different goals and standards, so judging others by our "standard" seems presumptuous--which certainly lends itself to the discussion of "cheaters." What standards are you using to determine departures deemed "cheating" or "inappropriate?"

And who claims the right to judge?

Love? An interesting concept posited into a discussion on cheating. And the relevance?

Relevant because love and acceptable behavior get conflated with rules and cheating.

Whose rules? ...

Love? A word. A twisted word. Is loving someone being willing to die for them, to take on any burden, to accept that individual without judgement? (And children are individuals, not extensions of ourselves.) Good parents love like that. Isn't love accepting that person with all their flaws and blessings?

But some believe "love" is having strict standards, forcing compliance, disapproving any departure and punishing failure to adhere. That "love" is a draconian fist that banishes any who dare sin against precious rules and standards. Too many parents have ostracized their kids for "breaking the rules" or "being a disappointment." The kid didn't follow the rules. And there was no leeway. Their way or the highway.

My friends who are police, firefighters, paramedics, military tend to dark humor. They disparage one another unmercifully--mostly as a sign of undying respect. Ever been in a locker room with successful athletes? They jokingly tear each other to shreds. It's relentless. Ever been in a military barrack around combat tested soldiers? Joking with someone is part of bonding.

The best parents tend to be like that. Challenging. Joking. Not taking it too seriously. Knowing life can be tough and helping their kids get tougher and more capable. Studies show that children raised by parents who are too nice tend to have trouble dealing with the emotional turmoil in the world.

So, like the song (if loving you is wrong) if wandering off topic to have friendly conversations is wrong, I don't want to be right.

That a parent doesn't love their kids by joking about them? Baffling. Great parents always joke about and with their kids. Always. Watch "Bring Up Bates." Learning to not take life too seriously is one of the greatest gifts a parent can hand a kid.

Not to mention, when did loving one's kids become a contest? Games can be competitive, but love-as-a-contest is never really love. Nor is friendship.

Matthew 7 roll those dice!

[flops]

ummm....wow! I was just thinking yesterday that the original "cheaters" post (which is years old) had yet again wandered away from the topic (when I post, I nearly always digress!). I wasn't actually complaining about my kids, they all live here, and some of their partners (and their partner's pets...which apparently makes me Obi Wan's Nanna), and note when they sms me, or want me too look at something I always go, because the little (but all bigger than me (Lalas boyfriend is 6'8")) weirdos are all very entertaining! The penalty for not attending plumbing emergencies is not even worth thinking about, so that's a no brainer.

There was a point where there were cheaters here, using programs to "break" the game, and occassionally we see queries about how some of the legends get such massive scores, but those are generally easy to explain.

Noboka, your last post was pretty cool, as was bwt123's.

Maybe I will start a new post, not named "cheaters", maybe I will make it a goal to use less commas and brackets, (or, maybe....not).

Peace Out, you twisters of words..., (hi ho, hi ho!...guess where I get to go?).

Flops (xx).