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If I ever start scoring thousand point games, please realize ....
or more likely:
I've become the mealy-minded slimebag that lurks in the hearts/minds of all , buried in the reptilian murk completely lacking a sense of conscience.
Why?
My sister in law and her husband came to visit. He's worked at Apple for decades. Whenever our computers misbehave, we call him up and from a 950 miles away he takes over the device and gets it fixed.
(He also finds all the inappropriate stuff I might have downloaded since his last incursion. Reciprocated bonus. It's good to have friends.)
Anyway, we were playing Wordtwist. He'd never played and was scoring what typical well-read individuals do early on. And was offended by mine.
Being competitive, he said that in two days he could destroy me.
Yeah, right.
(Being a sports fan, he's adopted a trash-talking, winner take all attitude about games. Winning is all. Sportsmanship is for losers.)
It didn't take him the full 48 hours. He contacted some friends, programmed whatever he needed, and came back to completely put my best to shame.
Since he was going to use my account (to avoid the ads that he'd grown to hate) for his demonstration of superiority, we agreed that he had to abort without finishing any of the games. I didn't want those scores distorting my averages or bests.
AND HE DESTROYED ME.
COMPLETELY.
And it didn't take him the full 2 minutes. He was beating my best-ever scores in less than a minute. He was making Megaword look average.
We discussed several tells that a player was likely using computer assist. He had workarounds for everything.
He even offered a hybrid boost, where he could put numbers of words in common groupings so all I had to do was push a key. We worked out a couple of these common groupings with around 20-30 words. I searched some games, found a board that would work, hit the keys he'd designated and had my best score ever in a minute and a half. And that's with fumbling with the process. Game aborted.
So tempting to keep that score.
It didn't matter if all the words within a grouping applied as long as some did. One stroke for 7-12 words. Cheap points.
Every day I battle with not eating the chocolates I habitually buy. Some days I succeed. Most days I don't.
Seeing those little boosts sitting on my computer are even more tempting. Just a couple of key strokes away from averaging over a thousand points a game.
When I reach to delete the Temptation, some part of my brain slithers from the shadows, wraps my will in a constrictor's death grip, and my hand falls weakly from the keyboard.
Such a lovely.
My lovely.
My precious.
Maybe I will ask my wife to delete it. Or my brother-in-law.
Maybe.
If I ever start scoring thousand point games, please realize ....
or more likely:
I've become the mealy-minded slimebag that lurks in the hearts/minds of all , buried in the reptilian murk completely lacking a sense of conscience.
Why?
My sister in law and her husband came to visit. He's worked at Apple for decades. Whenever our computers misbehave, we call him up and from a 950 miles away he takes over the device and gets it fixed.
(He also finds all the inappropriate stuff I might have downloaded since his last incursion. Reciprocated bonus. It's good to have friends.)
Anyway, we were playing Wordtwist. He'd never played and was scoring what typical well-read individuals do early on. And was offended by mine.
Being competitive, he said that in two days he could destroy me.
Yeah, right.
(Being a sports fan, he's adopted a trash-talking, winner take all attitude about games. Winning is all. Sportsmanship is for losers.)
It didn't take him the full 48 hours. He contacted some friends, programmed whatever he needed, and came back to completely put my best to shame.
Since he was going to use my account (to avoid the ads that he'd grown to hate) for his demonstration of superiority, we agreed that he had to abort without finishing any of the games. I didn't want those scores distorting my averages or bests.
AND HE DESTROYED ME.
COMPLETELY.
And it didn't take him the full 2 minutes. He was beating my best-ever scores in less than a minute. He was making Megaword look average.
We discussed several tells that a player was likely using computer assist. He had workarounds for everything.
He even offered a hybrid boost, where he could put numbers of words in common groupings so all I had to do was push a key. We worked out a couple of these common groupings with around 20-30 words. I searched some games, found a board that would work, hit the keys he'd designated and had my best score ever in a minute and a half. And that's with fumbling with the process. Game aborted.
So tempting to keep that score.
It didn't matter if all the words within a grouping applied as long as some did. One stroke for 7-12 words. Cheap points.
Every day I battle with not eating the chocolates I habitually buy. Some days I succeed. Most days I don't.
Seeing those little boosts sitting on my computer are even more tempting. Just a couple of key strokes away from averaging over a thousand points a game.
When I reach to delete the Temptation, some part of my brain slithers from the shadows, wraps my will in a constrictor's death grip, and my hand falls weakly from the keyboard.
Such a lovely.
My lovely.
My precious.
Maybe I will ask my wife to delete it. Or my brother-in-law.
Maybe.
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