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  • "People have always scared me a bit - they're so complicated. I suppose that's why I prefer horses." — Separate Tables

    kb83
    April 24, 2015, 3:41 am
    Who is Mr. or Ms. Tables?

    montyb
    August 5, 2015, 2:28 am
    I don't know, but I believe they are now separated.

    SippyGurl
    September 26, 2015, 4:16 pm
    Seppy, for short

    BriddlesBob
    December 1, 2015, 10:08 am
    Well, the bit in the horses mouth is complicated and scary too!

    wvwoman
    June 20, 2018, 1:14 pm
    wiki says: Separate Tables is a 1958 American drama film starring Rita Hayworth, Deborah Kerr, David Niven, Burt Lancaster, and Wendy Hiller, based on two one-act plays by Terence Rattigan that were collectively known by this name. Niven and Hiller won Academy Awards for their performances. The picture was directed by Delbert Mann and adapted for the screen by Rattigan, John Gay and an uncredited John Michael Hayes. Mary Grant and Edith Head designed the film's costumes.

    mtvoyager
    December 28, 2018, 7:31 am
    I remember that movie.

    abra
    October 12, 2019, 4:00 pm
    I don't know if I ever saw it, but I do remember that there was such a movie.

    blueladyblue
    June 27, 2020, 6:51 pm
    I think Separate Tables was married to Patio Tables. Their children, Dinner and Multiplication, went on to great careers -- one was a chef and the other a zookeeper. We can't always live up to our name.

    kb83
    November 22, 2020, 8:43 pm
    great retort, Montyb!

    Jrdad
    March 24, 2022, 1:38 pm
    Separate's brothers, Billiard, Craps, and Turnthe, worked for the Mob in Vegas.

    Comment


    • "Tell us your phobias, and we will tell you what you are afraid of." — Robert Benchley

      DrCryptell
      June 27, 2019, 2:19 am
      Tell me your name and I will tell you how they call you to dinner.

      blueladyblue
      August 6, 2019, 4:53 pm
      Tell me your height and I will tell you how tall you are.

      montyb
      September 15, 2021, 2:50 pm
      Tell me your bank account number and I’ll get back to you later.

      Comment


      • "All things may be bought in Rome with money. " — Juvenal

        maradnu
        November 23, 2013, 8:08 am
        Most places, for that matter.

        LLapp
        October 23, 2015, 7:30 am
        Without context, I wonder whether he meant that even political influence could be bought or that you can't go into town and expect to be buying things with chickens.

        judy100
        November 30, 2015, 12:40 pm
        Money talked 2000 yrs ago, and talks louder now.

        Persephone59
        October 11, 2017, 1:10 am
        Love, sex, political influence. People, too, I suppose (slaves). The usual.

        judy100
        March 31, 2018, 11:12 pm
        Silence too.

        imsoeasy
        December 11, 2018, 1:23 am
        I've been to Rome. They used to accept chickens, now its Euros.

        Wordigo
        August 12, 2020, 9:46 pm
        Follow the money.

        Ian123
        May 4, 2022, 1:26 am
        Follow the chickens.

        Comment


        • "The honorable gentleman had better spare his interrogations if they are as senseless as that one." — Charles Tupper

          Eureka
          December 1, 2018, 11:12 am
          This quote definitely needs context to make any sense.

          kb83
          April 22, 2019, 3:12 pm
          The argument was over someone questioning the concept of storing foods in plastic.

          abra
          October 6, 2019, 5:34 pm
          LOL, my mom was a Tupperware lady for decades.

          kb83
          January 20, 2020, 1:12 pm
          Actually he was a Canadian Statesman and a "father of confederation," i.e. of unifying the British colonies in North America. He coined the phrase "Keep a lid on it."

          Eureka
          October 16, 2020, 9:36 pm
          LOL kb83!

          Comment


          • "What harsh judges fathers are to all young men!" — Terence

            montyb
            November 25, 2019, 8:09 am
            I always tried to be fair and supportive to my son, Prisoner 694322.

            Comment


            • The disappearing first comment...

              "What should a wise person do when given a blow? Same as Cato when he was attacked; not fire up or revenge the insult, or even return the blow, but simply ignore it." — Seneca

              chopstix
              October 16, 2012, 2:36 am
              Very observant of you MissLynx... and it's still there!

              Allen
              October 22, 2013, 1:25 pm
              What would we do without Miss Lynx's observation?

              CarpeLanam
              April 16, 2017, 11:14 am
              From "De Constantia Sapientis (the firmness of a wise man)" "'At sapiens colapho percussus quid faciet?' Quod Cato, cum illi os percussum esset: non excanduit, non uindicauit iniuriam, ne remisit quidem, sed factam negauit; maiore animo non agnouit quam ignouisset." Cato, the quintessential Stoic philosopher, was once accidentally struck by a stranger in the bath, who apologized profusely. But Cato rose above the potential insult and ignored it, to his own and the stranger's benefit. This was quite a fun quote to research!

              SippyGurl
              September 5, 2018, 2:46 am
              what became of MissLynx's observation?

              Fudi
              January 29, 2020, 12:21 pm
              It was given a blow, apparently. We should ignore it, I guess.

              Synonymous
              May 20, 2020, 12:43 am
              SippyGurl, She's now the Missing Lynx.

              Comment


              • "The only reason a great many American families don't own an elephant is that they have never been offered an elephant for a dollar down and easy weekly payments."
                — Mad Magazine


                nevadasmith68
                July 31, 2013, 3:45 pm
                HAHA--True!
                montyb
                December 30, 2013, 2:43 pm
                What about white elephants?
                LLapp
                September 27, 2014, 5:03 pm
                Yes - a quote from MAD! More, please.
                gryhnd51
                April 12, 2015, 9:10 pm
                So true....so sad.
                opallady
                August 29, 2017, 11:00 am
                You can get all the things you seek/ For a dollar down and a dollar a week.
                Persephone59
                January 21, 2018, 9:36 pm
                I tried to hide it from the neighbors, but it kept trumpeting from the back yard!
                vintage38
                March 12, 2018, 7:13 am
                35 seconds
                blueladyblue
                April 22, 2018, 9:49 am
                Mad is not right. My elephant only cost peanuts. Still, I had to put it on layaway at Walmart. When I finally brought it home, I put it in the backseat of my car and the trunk in the trunk.
                letfreedomring
                August 16, 2019, 5:53 pm
                My first job in HS was in a credit department of a major department store. I leaned about credit accounts before I graduated and throughout my life found ways to get a zero % interest card to effect changes needed to my home. Suze Orman is right when she tells people to get rid of their credit card debt.
                Synonymous
                February 4, 2021, 10:42 pm
                blueladyblue very funny...
                jbb33054
                April 2, 2021, 7:24 pm
                34
                abra
                September 14, 2021, 8:44 pm
                It would scare me to have credit card debt. Suze is a smart woman. Credit cards are very convenient, but don't stack up the debt.
                jbb33054
                November 15, 2021, 6:40 pm
                49
                figmo
                March 16, 2022, 4:51 pm
                Even better, if you can figure out which MAD writer wrote the quote, it'd be great! A friend of mine was a Senior Editor of MAD for more than half of its existence.

                Comment


                • "Women are never disarmed by compliments; men always are." — Oscar Wilde

                  kb83
                  November 29, 2016, 11:57 am
                  Venus de Milo was.

                  Comment


                  • "You are not going to change the minds of people who are looking for attention." — Buzz Aldrin

                    Eureka
                    November 11, 2018, 3:04 am
                    I need more context to understand what he means.

                    Eureka
                    February 18, 2019, 9:09 am
                    Look at me!!!

                    Eureka
                    May 28, 2019, 10:28 am
                    That Eureka. Always looking for attention!

                    Eureka
                    October 16, 2019, 12:05 pm
                    This comment section is for Eureka only. No others need apply.

                    Eureka
                    November 17, 2019, 10:22 am
                    Glad to see that everyone is towing the line.

                    puffybob
                    November 27, 2019, 3:45 am
                    My guess is that he was referring to moon landing deniers. So instead, he punches them in the face. (link) (Sorry, Eureka, I couldn't resist posting the link.)

                    318WOZ
                    January 30, 2020, 10:21 pm
                    I'm delighted, Eureka! You held the floor here for over a year!

                    hrossa
                    June 20, 2020, 9:30 pm
                    I've found it!

                    abra
                    September 13, 2021, 7:54 pm
                    Thanks for holding the fort, Eureka. That was amazing. I'm paying rapt attention.

                    hrossa
                    June 17, 2022, 10:12 am
                    Now I don't remember what I'd found. Come back, Eureka!

                    Comment


                    • "The mother-daughter relationship is the most complex."
                      — Wynonna Judd


                      montyb
                      March 18, 2013, 11:33 am
                      Oh really? Obviously she has never experienced the guy's butt-LaZboy-cable remote relationship.
                      puzzleme
                      October 1, 2013, 5:46 pm
                      Monty, that's not a relationship; that's a menage-a-trois.
                      geeko321
                      February 18, 2014, 8:59 am
                      That's not a menage-a-trois, that's a bonding at the molecular level.
                      SippyGurl
                      August 20, 2015, 6:20 pm
                      that's not a bonding at the molecular level, that's a mother-daughter relationship ??
                      darkyr
                      June 5, 2017, 10:56 am
                      If only Wynonna had met you monty, her quote might be so complexly different.
                      SippyGurl
                      July 18, 2017, 11:09 am
                      lol hubs just took the remote and retired to the recliner
                      montyb
                      March 5, 2018, 12:34 pm
                      Your hubby is my kind of guy, SippyGurl!
                      mistyswiss
                      March 12, 2018, 11:51 pm
                      Monty, whatever that relationship is - it's not complex.
                      jbb33054
                      November 2, 2018, 8:34 am
                      31
                      rnodding
                      December 28, 2018, 10:28 am
                      30
                      jbb33054
                      January 27, 2019, 3:23 am
                      43
                      skeeter
                      March 10, 2019, 9:09 pm
                      These last three comments are deep, man, deep.
                      mohamm1
                      June 4, 2019, 4:03 am
                      Had to Google this one.
                      montyb
                      June 24, 2019, 10:54 pm
                      Wait Misty, 532 channels is not complex?! Then there is that SD/HD decision.
                      RedEnoch
                      March 31, 2022, 1:58 am
                      Especially when you throw in concert tours, publishing and performance rights, music industry lawyers, various exes and THEIR lawyers…

                      Comment


                      • "The highest use of capital is not to make more money, but to make money do more for the betterment of life." — Henry Ford

                        blueladyblue
                        February 4, 2018, 1:08 pm
                        Whose life? If it's for the betterment of the life of the moneymaker, then yawn, what else is new? And I really don't think most wealthy people are willing to use their money for the betterment of everyone else's life. Sorry, I'm cynical.

                        jimbo42
                        November 4, 2018, 7:53 pm
                        cynical, let's get cynical

                        Eureka
                        November 16, 2018, 3:01 am
                        Let me hear your money talk, your money talk.

                        Comment


                        • Abra made me laugh on this one:

                          "When I walk with you I feel as if I had a flower in my buttonhole."
                          — William M. Thackeray


                          abra
                          May 5, 2012, 2:13 pm
                          Awww, kind of sweet.
                          abra
                          April 2, 2013, 9:26 pm
                          I still think it's sweet.
                          abra
                          December 14, 2013, 11:35 am
                          and still...
                          abra
                          February 19, 2014, 1:29 pm
                          I think there's an echo in here.
                          montyb
                          July 30, 2014, 4:21 pm
                          ...in here...in here...in here...in here...
                          abra
                          September 18, 2014, 4:52 pm
                          Wow, ya know, I think this one is kind of sweet.
                          pegxpeg
                          December 16, 2015, 11:10 am
                          I'm glad it was buttonhole, or these comments would have gone in a different direction.
                          abra
                          May 2, 2016, 6:49 pm
                          Well, it's been a while since I've been here.
                          Hawthorn
                          December 20, 2016, 1:50 am
                          I hope he was making that exact face when he said it.
                          Persephone59
                          January 23, 2017, 6:15 pm
                          He looks a bit like Grumpy Cat (Tartar Sauce). But I agree with all those Abras; it is a kind sentiment.
                          skeeter
                          February 7, 2017, 2:12 am
                          Ah . . . the ubiquitous "buttonhole" pattern clenched it for me right away.
                          marnita
                          September 3, 2018, 10:41 am
                          Amazing, Abra has had this one at least 6 times, and I don't recall ever seeing it before.
                          mtvoyager
                          December 11, 2018, 6:11 am
                          abra how much time do you spend doing this?
                          Elephino
                          April 14, 2020, 9:38 pm
                          haha pegxpeg! a flower in one's hole would make it more difficult to walk... I think
                          LLapp
                          June 15, 2020, 1:36 am
                          mtvoyager, you have asked a forbidden question.
                          marnita
                          December 1, 2020, 7:05 pm
                          Well, I still don't remember seeing it before, so who knows how many times I may have seen it?
                          imported_bees
                          April 25, 2021, 7:25 am
                          My comments are secretly to myself to say "yes you have seen this before" I certainly never recognize them in time to improve my time.70/288
                          abra
                          October 9, 2021, 10:41 pm
                          He's played by Miles Jupp, in The Man Who Invented Christmas. mtvoyager, I probably spend twenty or thirty minutes here a couple of times a week. I just get this one a lot. That's my story and I'm sticking to it. )
                          Celsus
                          October 16, 2021, 10:58 pm
                          BUTTON hole. [Head smack] I've been putting it in the wrong spot.

                          Comment


                          • Abra is the star of this one.

                            "You are the most beautiful girl that has ever lived, and it is worth dying to have kissed you."
                            — Dylan Thomas


                            abra
                            April 8, 2012, 4:11 am
                            WOW!
                            abra
                            August 29, 2012, 6:39 pm
                            It still made me say "wow".
                            tskaggs6
                            September 13, 2012, 9:57 pm
                            She may indeed be that beautiful. But if I gotta die I'm thinking I'd like more than a kiss.
                            bansaisequoia
                            October 30, 2012, 4:13 pm
                            Wow. He's really confused about my gender. Come to think of it, he's never kissed me.
                            wjjmcjr
                            June 7, 2013, 11:45 pm
                            CAN I HAVE HER NUMBER?
                            WRQ9
                            June 9, 2013, 6:42 pm
                            A vision of perfection with a trail of corpses, entropy's shining example. Hiroshima, all over again. I saw the movie in stead.
                            abra
                            July 2, 2014, 11:07 am
                            I didn't remember this quote, and I was about to write "wow", when I saw I'd said that, twice before.
                            msswitch
                            July 21, 2014, 6:27 am
                            madness....
                            LLapp
                            October 8, 2014, 12:57 pm
                            This from the man who lined up 18 shots of whiskey and drank them and died the next day.
                            abra
                            October 23, 2014, 5:06 pm
                            Well, maybe he kissed HER, between shots 12 and 13.
                            ruxpin66
                            January 22, 2016, 5:26 pm
                            Abra, since you're here almost weekly, I thought I'd say hello.
                            abra
                            May 22, 2016, 1:12 pm
                            I;m back ruxspin, hello. Bansai's comment is way up there, but it's REALLY funny.
                            abra
                            July 16, 2018, 6:51 pm
                            I'm back, and I'm leaving a tray of cookies in the corner. It's starting to feel like ''my'' place. ;o)
                            puzzleme
                            November 24, 2018, 3:55 pm
                            Abra, I think it's time for you to move on. Dylan's been dead since 1953.
                            abra
                            December 26, 2018, 6:11 pm
                            Oh, but in my heart he's alive and saying beautiful things. I brought wine to go with the cookies.
                            imsoeasy
                            April 24, 2020, 1:54 pm
                            If he drank that much, I wouldn't trust his vision of beauty.
                            abra
                            October 1, 2020, 10:05 pm
                            I think we used to have a recording of A Child's Christmas in Wales. I just had to go listen to a little bit of it on Youtube. This time I read the Death section on Wiki. He was a very ill man. Besides being a serious alcoholic, he had emphysema, he had pneumonia when he died. How horrible that he died so young.
                            imsoeasy
                            April 17, 2021, 10:38 am
                            A great pickup line. Along with his boyish good looks he must have been hitting close to 1000.
                            abra
                            September 24, 2021, 1:58 am
                            I sort of glanced at the source and I was thinking ''this really doesn't sound like Bob Dylan''. I've restocked the wine, and washed the glasses.
                            LLapp
                            September 29, 2021, 12:39 am
                            Abra sure knows how to throw a party! (Never mind the dead poet in the corner.)
                            Descifrador
                            June 4, 2022, 3:27 am
                            I guess he found out the girl had bacterial meningitis.

                            Comment


                            • "Though a tree grow ever so high, the falling leaves return to the ground."
                              — Malayan Proverb

                              Don't miss Synonymous's comment.


                              wobray
                              November 30, 2012, 10:16 pm
                              Wouldn't "grows" be more appropriate here?
                              CarpeLanam
                              March 15, 2013, 8:28 pm
                              This demonstrates the traditional use of the subjunctive mood for conditional statements, although it has fallen into disuse in modern English.
                              abra
                              October 20, 2013, 6:36 pm
                              I'm in awe.
                              abra
                              March 11, 2015, 11:51 am
                              I'm still in awe, of Carpelanam, not the proverb.
                              universalmom
                              June 18, 2015, 10:22 am
                              Spoken like a true Latin scholar, Carpe
                              blueladyblue
                              February 5, 2018, 1:08 pm
                              I don't like autumn. Dead things, even leaves, make me sad. Though.
                              LLapp
                              June 12, 2019, 5:26 pm
                              What makes the sentence subjunctive is that it's setting up a hypothetical situation. The subjunctive mood is the mood of possible or imagined reality, rather than actual fact. The implied word "might" fits in this one -- "Though a tree might grow ever so high" -- and there you have the "possible reality" setup.
                              mohamm1
                              December 13, 2020, 11:41 pm
                              Though a crypto solve take ever so long... 278 seconds.
                              NoiseLTD
                              September 30, 2021, 12:34 pm
                              wobray CarpeLanam's comment was in response to yours. The verb "grow" is subjunctive. It's like "God bless America." It's not imperative, "God, bless America!", giving God an order. More the sense of "May God bless America." "God blesses America." is indicative mood.
                              Synonymous
                              March 30, 2022, 10:04 pm
                              (Raised Hand) Can I go to the bathroom?

                              Comment

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