Classic Comments on the Quote

[mistyswiss]

Will this work for you, interactiveleaf?

"I believe that men are generally still a little afraid of the dark, though the witches are all hung, and Christianity and candles have been introduced."— Henry David Thoreau

abra
September 21, 2013, 10:45 am
Hey! One of those witches was my ancestor. You didn't have to be afraid of her.

LLapp
March 23, 2015, 11:56 am
The fact that the witches are all hung is the dark I am afraid of.

interactiveleaf
August 8, 2015, 7:21 pm
Can LLapp's comment be added to this site? It deserves it.

[oddcouple]

"We cannot hold a torch to light another's path without brightening our own."
— Ben Sweetland


wvwoman
June 8, 2013, 11:59 pm
i was frightening my path.
puzzleme
July 24, 2013, 7:03 am
Some paths can be very frightening.
Roxanne
August 24, 2013, 7:25 pm
I lit another's math. Which makes sense, since many research mathematicians work in pairs.
universalmom
April 23, 2014, 1:24 am
Roxanne that's awesome! We should all light each other's math
maradnu
March 11, 2015, 7:58 am
I should have burned some of my calculus homework
abra
March 17, 2015, 5:20 pm
Maybe that's the problem with my math, no one offered to light it.
LLapp
January 3, 2017, 1:34 pm
What a psychedelic photo of him -- he is a head floating amid fireworks.
writeon
June 16, 2017, 4:43 pm
Yeah, but it's better if you stay on your own path or else others expect you and everyone else to keep holding up their torch on their path. (I'm cynical because I currently have an adult child at home.)
LLapp
September 24, 2017, 5:13 pm
"Adult child" -- isn't it interesting that we have no good word for this? Try telling your adult child that he/she is an oxymoron.
mmfs83
October 13, 2018, 3:24 am
I had frightening and that path was my error.

[oddcouple]

"It is unbecoming for young men to utter maxims. "
— Aristotle


JCarlosCuevas
July 29, 2009, 7:23 pm
Agreed!
puffybob
July 27, 2010, 4:42 am
I wonder how old he was when he said that.
locodad
March 17, 2013, 3:34 pm
Iam in trouble. Ithink myson uttered a maxim but I didn't understand.Is that aknew slang or something?
dovid1946
February 19, 2015, 2:22 pm
it is unbecoming for young cattle farmers to udder maxims
kb83
July 17, 2015, 9:18 am
Since maxims are supposed to be pithy, why aren't they called "minims?"
darkyr
May 3, 2017, 8:49 am
Oh, I think you just uttered a minim right then.
pj48
July 10, 2017, 4:04 pm
Young men becoming maximen?
LLapp
June 18, 2019, 8:31 pm
This is a great maxim in itself.
montyb
March 15, 2020, 9:48 am
Well I'm old, so maxim, maxim, maxim!

[oddcouple]

"Hares can gambol over the body of a dead lion."
— Publilius Syrus


bansaisequoia
August 20, 2010, 10:38 pm
Publilius Syrus actually said, "Hares can gambol over the body of a dead lion." In other words, the hares would romp and cavort.
maradnu
April 2, 2011, 11:09 pm
Should be gambol, not gamble
abra
June 12, 2013, 12:23 am
It's a good thing they fixed it, I would never have got it. I'd have been thinking of those hares with their cards and dice.
Barnabas
September 2, 2014, 2:47 pm
They could gamble, too, if they knew how.
CarpeLanam
September 3, 2015, 4:36 am
Their ears twitch when they're bluffing.
kb83
April 13, 2016, 10:08 am
If the lion is dead, it's called gambling, if the ion is alive it's called gamboling.
marnita
September 3, 2016, 12:06 pm
Surely it's the other way around, kb83.
pj48
September 23, 2016, 9:08 pm
Yes, kb, it's a gamble if the lion is alive.
kb83
November 28, 2016, 10:02 am
oops. my bad!
Persephone59
August 27, 2017, 10:36 pm
How I got this, I'll never know.
skeeter
December 13, 2017, 4:08 pm
Gamble, gambol. I think you all are just splitting hares.
SippyGurl
January 15, 2018, 9:18 am
if you're spitting hares is that cottontail mouth
LLapp
June 12, 2018, 10:21 am
Wow, that was a challenge, and well worth it for the delightful comments.
badbob
February 11, 2019, 10:36 pm
i put harem
jbb33054
March 6, 2020, 6:34 pm
456
LLapp
March 11, 2020, 3:16 pm
Wow, you can find just about anything on Google Images: (link)

[LLapp]

"The only truly secure system is one that is powered off, cast in a block of concrete and sealed in a lead-lined room with armed guards -- and even then I have my doubts." — Eugene H. Spafford

RedEnoch
October 25, 2011, 12:45 pm
I guess I shouldn't have used my SSN as a password, then...

fredsevent
November 3, 2011, 8:59 pm
Ooo.. I better change my password, because I used your SSN, too!

[oddcouple]

"You can't make an omelette without breaking eggs. "
— Unattributed

PianoManGidley
December 2, 2010, 1:37 am
Any cook will tell you that. But look what happened to the cook!
Lurker
December 22, 2010, 1:37 am
I love that movie.
bansaisequoia
August 2, 2011, 2:16 pm
What movie?
WRQ9
July 27, 2012, 12:06 am
What cook?
BeeAre
September 22, 2012, 1:04 pm
I thought this was Walter Durranty talking about Joe Stalin starving millions of people in the Ukraine famine of the late thirties.
locodad
September 28, 2012, 10:50 am
What did the egg say to the cook?-You crack me up
Lurker
September 21, 2013, 12:55 pm
The movie was Clue. I believe this particular exchange was Martin Mull and Eileen Brennan.
LLapp
January 27, 2015, 11:51 am
BeeAre, that was an awesome comment.
darkyr
January 26, 2018, 10:04 am
You can't have bacon with your omelette without breaking a pig.
tavi5280
March 10, 2018, 3:29 am
Q:What did thee chicken say when she saw an omelette? A: Just look at all those mixed up kids!
Eureka
December 29, 2018, 3:54 am
Thanks for all the laughs everyone!
oddcouple
August 30, 2019, 12:54 am
I didn't know there was another way to spell omelet.
DaveR
October 27, 2019, 11:42 am
“It is a damn poor mind that can think of only one way to spell a word.” ― Andrew Jackson
DrCryptell
November 7, 2019, 7:03 am
You can't barbeque a steak without killing a cow and you can't bake a cherry pie without cutting down a tree. So? Is this a CNBC headline story?

[oddcouple]

"Admit your errors before someone else exaggerates them."
— Andrew V. Mason

montyb
March 25, 2014, 12:21 pm
You know, I thought I had once made an error, but I was wrong.
JD_1947
November 23, 2014, 6:11 am
and especially before they exammerates them, or worse still . . exaccerates them . . .
jval
May 26, 2015, 3:28 pm
If you admit your mistakes, you have a hard time explaining when you do the same thing again ... ask my second husband.
darkyr
November 13, 2017, 4:48 pm
I forget to admit one trivial error and Andrew's been all over me since.
Fudi
March 31, 2020, 4:27 pm
When I saw the aBBcBd pattern, I first tried decoding the "B" as an "E", but then I realized the word must be "errors". It was an honest mistake. It could have happened to anybody. Don't make such a big deal of it. Like you've never guessed something was an "E" that didn't turn out to be, Fancypants?
jbb33054
March 31, 2020, 6:13 pm
126

[oddcouple]

"Angling may be said to be so like the mathematics that it can never be fully learned. "
— Izaak Walton

tgreen517
September 7, 2014, 11:10 am
Sounds fishy to me!
abra
May 6, 2015, 12:42 pm
"THE mathematics".
wordfairy
May 23, 2015, 9:20 pm
g'nite, Izaak-boy!
LLapp
July 23, 2017, 5:04 pm
wordfairy - very funny!
DrCryptell
May 5, 2018, 4:51 am
Dangling is even worse 'cause you add a "D." and subtract the math. (This makes about as much sense as the quote itself)
kb83
September 29, 2018, 8:14 am
Reminds me of the mountaineer father who went to meet his son's teacher and asked her to give him plenty of the Trigonometry, because he was such a lousy shot.
kb83
March 28, 2020, 11:25 pm
For a mathematical holiday, try angling.

[mistyswiss]

Nice to finally learn who is behind SippyGurl...

"He that does not ask will never get a bargain."
— French Proverb

Leilani
August 9, 2010, 11:10 am

He who does not ask will never get a bargain

.... comments removed for brevity....

SippyGurl
October 2, 2017, 6:56 pm

mom said she wanted to name me leilani but dad picked instead

LLapp
November 1, 2017, 6:53 pm

Well I think Instead is a lovely name.

[oddcouple]

"If all the cars in the United States were placed end to end, it would probably be Labor Day Weekend."
— Doug Larson


chriscrojam
October 2, 2011, 4:33 am
I love this one.
agatha
February 3, 2012, 9:59 am
If all the cars in the United States were placed end to end, it would probably be April 15th.
sgardzal
September 1, 2013, 8:15 am
I got this on labor day weekend 2013!!
Allen
November 12, 2014, 7:28 am
Remembering Dorothy Parker as best I can right now: 'if all the co-eds at the Yale-Harvard game were laid end-to-end, I wouldn't be a bit surprised.'
abra
November 20, 2014, 10:42 am
That IS one of Dorothy Parker's snarkiest and funniest quotes.
lainecap
February 16, 2018, 3:11 pm
If all the economists in the world were laid end-to-end, they still couldn't reach a conclusion.
lertsek
March 6, 2018, 12:01 pm
At first I had bars.
agatejane
July 7, 2018, 11:17 am
42 sec
abra
December 7, 2019, 10:25 pm
If all the girls who attended the Yale prom were laid end to end, I wouldn't be a bit surprised. Dorothy Parker
DrCryptell
March 18, 2020, 1:53 am
If all the cars in the United States were laid end to end where the HELL would they be parked? On the equator?

[oddcouple]

"The only reason for being a professional writer is that you can't help it. "
— Leo Rosten


LLapp
March 1, 2015, 3:48 pm
Same goes for pursuing theater, music, or visual arts as a profession.
LLapp
September 9, 2015, 8:36 am
Why yes, of course I'll expound further: All my life, no matter what I've pursued, no matter what I changed my major to, no matter what I've been hired to do, people have always wound up giving me their writing to edit. I've written stuff that lots of people have read (mostly about investing) but my proudest moment in any paid job was the time I fixed what had been nonsensical wording in the storage instructions on the Advil bottle. I still stop in the store sometimes just to admire it. I can't not edit, so I may as well be paid for it.
wvwoman
November 14, 2015, 7:29 am
llapp, the advil bottle admiration story gave me a chuckle!
BriddlesBob
November 22, 2015, 6:25 pm
it gave me a head ache....
oddcouple
September 3, 2016, 12:52 pm
Take some Advil, Bob.
maradnu
December 17, 2016, 1:58 pm
I need to write. I need to tell stories - even if no one else is really ever aware of them.
marnita
July 3, 2017, 1:21 pm
And be sure to follow the instructions on the bottle, Bob.
jbb33054
March 26, 2020, 4:50 pm
37

[Eureka]

"If you can't beat your computer at chess, try kickboxing." — Anonymous

maradnu
May 19, 2009, 12:01 am
A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing. - Emo Philips

Altoid701
July 23, 2009, 8:46 pm
Hahahahaha.

jenandbrent
January 28, 2013, 3:44 pm
I guess I need to try kickboxing.

bazinga
October 23, 2013, 2:27 pm
LOL I love it

dddeedee
August 18, 2015, 5:35 am
Revenge of the kick boxing robot!

judy100
August 7, 2018, 10:14 am
Now it's discus throwing, it was fun kicking IBM mainframes

blueladyblue
August 27, 2019, 3:58 pm
Yeah, I could get down with throwing my computer across the room.

Phil Srobeighn
November 21, 2019, 3:23 pm
maradnu is right, this should be corrected and attributed to Emo Philips. Also, "My ex-wife had weekly lessons with the devil on how to be more evil. I don't know how much she charged him."

[LLapp]

"The moment one gives close attention to any thing, even a blade of grass - it becomes a mysterious, awesome, indescribably magnificent world in itself." — Henry Miller

Eureka
January 31, 2019, 5:41 pm
Quit stalling. Just mow the lawn, Henry.

[LLapp]

Dark poetry from darkyr

"Nobody ever committed suicide while reading a good book, but many have while trying to write one." — Robert Byrne

darkyr
May 8, 2018, 10:47 am
Here lies the next great author. With themes and plots he would not bother. He drew his pen in one bold stroke, His blood like ink, the page will soak.

[kahvecowgirl]

Hopefully there aren't any easily offended people of British persuasion out there. I don't have a great sense of how offensive one particular word in this is, but it was too funny to pass up.

"An honest man is the best thing on the sod; but a mother and her babe is the noblest work of God. "
— Unattributed

nevadasmith68
November 7, 2013, 6:43 am
That's true.
LLapp
June 5, 2015, 4:49 pm
Nothing like an honest man on the sod.
rooby2s
December 11, 2015, 2:45 pm
True, but, once 9n a while, it would be nice to have a quote with which today's working class person could identify. Not so stilted.
kb83
August 7, 2017, 9:08 am
An honest sod is the best thing in creation. But a bloke and his babe make the next generation.