Classic Comments on the Quote

[montyb]

"It may be a cold, clammy thing to say, but those that treat friendship the same as any other selfishness seem to get the most out of it. "
— Edgar Watson Howe

nevadasmith68
September 24, 2013, 3:49 pm
How did this guy ever invent the sewing machine?

Hash
February 12, 2015, 7:26 am
Elias Howe is not the same person as is Edgar Howe.

LLapp
October 2, 2016, 5:46 pm
That's correct. Edgar Howe was the founder of the Cold Clams franchise at Redondo Beach.

Roxanne
March 12, 2017, 5:40 am
Elias Howe invented the machine that sews two halves of a clamshell together, which was much appreciated by all who do not like sandy fried clams. When he was praised for his invention, he merely said "shucks."

[oddcouple]

"The men who really believe in themselves are all in lunatic asylums."
— Gilbert Chesterton


maradnu
April 14, 2009, 12:56 am
They have not gotten me yet.
banzaisequoia
December 31, 2009, 11:39 pm
They're coming to take me away! Ha! Ha!
matarisa
July 19, 2011, 3:22 pm
I'm biting my tongue.
kb77
September 12, 2011, 2:19 am
theyll never take me alive!!!
montyb
July 31, 2012, 2:16 am
I'm going back to my room now, Nurse Ratched.
wvwoman
September 5, 2012, 1:37 am
...to the funny farm where life is beautiful all the time...
harmiger
June 26, 2013, 2:13 pm
But only the men, we women are free to do as we believe.
universalmom
April 22, 2014, 6:46 am
He's just being pouty...look at his expression
kb83
September 12, 2014, 8:12 am
He has the most entries in the book of "Senior Moments".
puzzleme
May 12, 2015, 7:06 am
This photo makes him appear to be speaking from experience.
LLapp
June 16, 2017, 2:17 pm
...and I'll be happy to see those nice young men in their clean white coats...
maradnu
October 15, 2018, 5:23 am
Self deprecating humor can lead them astray.

[oddcouple]

"I have become rather like King Midas, except that everything turns not into gold but into a circus."
— Albert Einstein


puzzleme
October 20, 2013, 10:51 am
I can relate to that.
dovid1946
May 26, 2015, 4:46 am
it's all relative
LLapp
March 17, 2016, 6:40 pm
Sad.
BriddlesBob
April 28, 2016, 8:38 pm
Albert use to attend all kinds of family reunions, claiming he was a relative.
emtonsti
March 24, 2017, 10:28 am

Marboy
March 25, 2017, 4:27 pm
You energy, unless you travel faster than the speed of ight - then you matter! (I may have this the wrong way round but I like it anyway!
maradnu
July 14, 2017, 3:20 pm
I'm still a couple clowns short of a circus.
lainecap
August 12, 2017, 3:27 pm
Did you hear about the magician walking down the street who turned into a drugstore.
DrCryptell
January 17, 2018, 7:32 pm
and when he opens a door it becomes ajar
BriddlesBob
April 17, 2018, 2:17 am
no, but I heard about the magician traveling down the street with a young lady and turned her into a motel
DonnaIrene
September 18, 2018, 2:44 am
He's complaining about the fact that when he went anywhere, people recognized him and things turned into a circus. But his friend Robert Berks said, "But deep down, if he really hadn’t wanted any publicity, he would have gotten his hair cut and worn ordinary suits."

[oddcouple]

"A mistress never is nor can be a friend. While you agree, you are lovers; and when it is over, anything but friends. "
— Lord Byron


silveryaspen
May 8, 2009, 9:01 pm
when the man betrays the wife and the mistress another woman ... the betrayal undermines all three and none remain friends!
kjmcaj
April 3, 2013, 5:45 pm
here-here !!!
Allen
July 7, 2013, 1:45 pm
There, there.
maradnu
December 5, 2013, 11:07 am
Where? Where?
abracadebra
February 7, 2015, 4:45 am
Here a mistress, there a mistress, everywhere a mistress, but yet they stay nowhere.
zenith
May 8, 2015, 4:46 am
Ha funny thread, people!
judy100
December 1, 2016, 8:17 am
He learned from his love affairs.
DrCryptell
August 23, 2018, 4:25 pm
What if your mistress wallpapers your house? Is she a friend or a paper layer?
jbb33054
February 26, 2020, 8:39 am
57

[oddcouple]

"There is no satisfaction in hanging a man who does not object to it"
— George Bernard Shaw


Kgun5
April 29, 2013, 3:37 pm
Missing its period.
Lurker
June 24, 2013, 6:31 pm
Compared to some of the other mistakes around here, I'm willing to live without one dot of punctuation at the end.
puzzleme
August 23, 2013, 12:41 am
I thought perhaps it was just pregnant with meaning.
chopstix
September 15, 2013, 3:38 pm
An excellent observation puzzleme!
cindidido
February 26, 2014, 4:45 am
Pity anyone who is finds satisfaction in this manner and is disappointed otherwise.
insomniac
April 15, 2015, 9:09 pm
Not many people don't object to being hanged. I don't think there is any record of an execution by hanging where the person being executed went "WHEEE!!" as s/he dropped.
abra
June 16, 2015, 9:54 am
I can't get no satisfaction...
badbob
February 26, 2017, 8:43 pm
who invented the trap door?
DaveR
October 3, 2018, 6:29 am
A masochist met a sadist. The masochist asked if the sadist can beat him up. The sadist, with a gleam in his eye, answered; "NO."
Altoid701
January 22, 2019, 4:46 am
This is another quote that seems to be repeated on the site. I got this earlier today and it had different comments.
MissKitty
February 8, 2019, 2:46 pm
Kilroy 26
Disturbed1
April 30, 2019, 1:21 pm
Is there satisfaction in hanging a man who does object to it? I've never tried.
DrCryptell
December 11, 2019, 5:51 am
Shoot me, Baby, and after the funeral I'll treat you to a steak dinner.

[oddcouple]

Classic Monty

"It is only through timidity that states are lost. "
— Voltaire

puzzler86
March 31, 2014, 7:14 pm
44 seconds
JD_1947
December 11, 2014, 3:49 am
. . . okay . . .I guess . . .
maradnu
August 22, 2016, 3:20 pm
No, the third reich was not lost through timidity, but rather through greed and arrogance.
Jalapenoman
January 18, 2017, 2:05 pm
They just announced on the news that no one can find Delaware! Can someone please check lost and found?
montyb
December 24, 2017, 2:38 am
I would, but I'm a little timid.
abra
December 31, 2017, 2:58 pm
Very funny.

[oddcouple]

"Men, like nails, lose their usefulness when they lose direction and begin to bend. "
— Walter Savage Landor

cryptoleon
May 17, 2012, 6:43 am
women like wine need to age to be fully appreciated.
rotorguru
January 16, 2014, 9:56 am
and also when you hit them on the head.
JD_1947
January 12, 2015, 1:56 am
Women, like finger nails, . . . !
marnita
April 9, 2016, 4:12 am
But nails do not lose their effectiveness when you hit them on the head.
zenith
July 20, 2018, 11:18 am
But nails dont "lose their direction" - they just go where you hit them
LLapp
October 14, 2018, 7:36 pm
Let's face it, this is a dumb simile.
killdozer
December 27, 2018, 5:55 pm
Am I driven or am I just hammered?
Persephone59
April 23, 2019, 3:58 pm
Whichever it is, killdozer, you made me smile.

[LLapp]

"What matters is this: you can look at a scar and see hurt, or you can look at a scar and see healing. Try to understand." — Sherri Reynolds

puffybob
January 3, 2015, 7:14 am
I'm going to start adding "Try to understand" after all my wise pronouncements.

jval
March 29, 2015, 6:05 am
Or you can look at a scar and see that you did a stupid thing once when removing a baked potato from the oven. Try to understand.

skeeter
March 27, 2017, 7:07 am
A New Yorker cartoon showed that dogs add, after everything they're thinking, "and what's THAT you're eating?".

Eureka
October 30, 2018, 4:05 am
I understand how dangerous baked potatoes can be, jval.

Synonymous
March 3, 2020, 7:14 pm
Eureka, does baked potatoes = Weapons of mashed destruction?

[LLapp]

Timely wisdom from William James & darkyr...

"Great emergencies and crises show us how much greater our vital resources are than we had supposed." — William James

darkyr
May 22, 2017, 9:16 am
Sometimes those things show us how little we have prepared.

[mistyswiss]

"Guard your roving thoughts with a jealous care, for speech is but the dialer of thoughts, and every fool can plainly read in your words what is the hour of your thoughts. "
— Alfred Lord Tennyson

montyb
March 12, 2012, 11:05 pm
Thank goodness for daylight saving time. Now my thoughts are an hour ahead of a fool's reading.

[montyb]

"Is any man free except the one who can pass his life as he pleases? "
— Aulus Persius Flaccus

jimdgar
March 3, 2017, 10:38 am
Yeah, yeah, rub it in.

[oddcouple]

"I think you might dispense with half your doctors if you would only consult Dr. Sun more."
— Henry Ward Beecher

octopunchy
November 13, 2012, 4:50 pm
But I thought Dr. Sun has had his license revoked for giving all those people skin cancer...
locodad
May 3, 2013, 2:05 pm
i LIKE YOUR COMMENT OCTOPUNCHY, LOL.
LLapp
November 12, 2014, 5:40 am
Pretty weird quote, coming from a guy who looked like a zombie.
dovid1946
December 13, 2014, 5:46 am
Wasn't he the leader of Korea?
kb83
March 21, 2016, 4:15 am
dovid1946, I thought he (Dr. Sun More) might have been a Korean practictioner of the time.
oddcouple
July 10, 2016, 12:16 am
On the other hand, if you consulted with Dr. Sun Myung Moon, you could have ended up in a cult.
abra
October 13, 2016, 5:22 pm
He certainly doesn't look like he got a lot of sun.
mmfs83
February 24, 2017, 8:50 am
I wonder if he wore a speedo.
skeeter
April 5, 2017, 12:55 pm
Thanks a lot, mmfs83, for painting a picture I can't erase from my mind. Brrrr.
Persephone59
April 30, 2018, 6:16 pm
His alabaster skin blinded one, in the sunlight, as he glistened with lake water after taking a dip to better show off his tight red Speedo... no wonder women swooned at him. Heh.
KSSprague
September 5, 2018, 6:13 pm
Too funny! You are all so clever! Thanks for the laughs.
No2son
April 21, 2019, 9:29 pm
Aspirin Man!
Eureka
August 9, 2019, 8:46 pm
LOL octopunchy!

[bees]

"When a problem comes along, study it until you are completely knowledgeable. Then find that weak spot, break the problem apart, and the rest will be easy. "
— Norman Vincent Peale
dovid1946
May 24, 2015, 8:40 am
During the 1952 Presidential campaign, Dr. Peale supported Eisenhower and urged his followers to vote for him, because he found Adlai Stevenson to be insufficiently religious. Stevenson replied-' I find St. Paul appealing and St. Peale apalling'

[LLapp]

"Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils." — Hector Berlioz

marnita
May 28, 2018, 12:38 pm
No wonder people like to kill time.

[oddcouple]

Amazed at my own humor on this one!

"Did you ever stop to taste a carrot? Not just eat it, but taste it? You can't taste the beauty and energy of the earth in a Twinkie."
— Astrid Alauda


fredsevent
December 29, 2011, 4:29 pm
Me like Twinkies. Me no like carrots. Me no like this quote.
billkeiko
January 9, 2013, 8:22 pm
this was my first online crypt. nice website. thanks
montyb
June 3, 2013, 1:06 am
Carrot cake Twinkie?
bansaisequoia
August 20, 2013, 12:49 am
Brilliant idea, monty! We'll fill the carrot cake twinkies with cream cheese frosting and make million$!
skoogie2
November 15, 2013, 3:27 pm
Oh my gosh! I want a carrot cake twinkie!
abra
February 26, 2014, 2:57 pm
I'll just eat the frosting. I don't want to taste all that carrot cake, Earth energy.
maradnu
March 26, 2015, 4:05 pm
I'd rather eat carrots than twinkies. Then again, I'd rather eat fettuccine alfredo than either of those
marnita
June 9, 2015, 6:51 pm
I don't care for Twinkies, but I could definitely go for Monty and Bansai's carrot cake version!
oddcouple
January 16, 2016, 12:38 am
There appears to be no such person as Astrid Alauda, so it very well may be a pseudonym.
abra
March 30, 2016, 9:24 am
I only eat carrots, if they're cut the right way. Three or four inch cross cut pieces for stew, cut length wise with pot roast, julienned for soup, grated for salad, never, ever diced in anything. There are no exceptions to the rules. Well there's one exception, if I'm a guest, eating someone else's cooking. In that case, I will try to discreetly mash them with my fork.
wvwoman
June 30, 2016, 3:23 pm
very interesting, abra! are you that fastidious with other foods?
SwampySox
July 22, 2016, 11:48 am
Gimme carrot cake with 1/2 in cream cheese icing, or carrots out of the garden. (They tasted soo-oo good when we raided gardens as kids.)
oddcouple
August 27, 2016, 10:41 am
This time I tried to taste a parrot. He just squawked.
marnita
September 15, 2016, 11:44 am
I still have a hankering for a carrot cake Twinkie.
SippyGurl
December 10, 2016, 8:36 am
i make carrot bread with lemon icing, mebbe next time ima put a layer of icing in the middle as well
puzzleme
March 8, 2017, 2:55 pm
oddcouple made me guffaw so suddenly I nearly choked on my imaginary carrot cake twinkie. (And I still think Astrud is the twin from whom Robert Brault was separated at birth.)
marnita
June 10, 2017, 3:26 am
No munchin' on the parrots, Odd. We may have to get the Audubon Society after you.
kb83
July 7, 2017, 6:54 am
The twinkie is a primal food. It connects us with every source of energy and harmony in the universe.
phthelen
August 5, 2017, 2:20 pm
Welcome billkeiko. Don't worry, the roomies aren't always this crazy. LOL.
maradnu
September 16, 2017, 2:45 am
Yes, we are
NotTooOld
November 27, 2017, 12:47 pm
I love raw carrots, so crunchy and sweet! Twinkies are yuck!
abra
June 13, 2018, 12:14 pm
Marnita, no, some veggies I avoid entirely, but carrots are the only ones that have ''rules''. Astrid, I think that ''Earth energy'' is actually DIRT. Do you have one of the vegetable brushes?
imsoeasy
February 10, 2019, 1:47 am
Warning! Consuming Twinkies instead of healthful carrots could be a sign of depression which could cause you to do something violent.
darkyr
May 1, 2019, 11:43 am
I really stopped to taste a carrot the other day and it made me think of cream cheese filled twinkies. Now that is some crazy earth energy.