Classic Comments on the Quote

[ddph]

"The nice thing about egotists is that they don't talk about other people. "
— Lucille S. Harper

puzzleme on 2013-08-05 01:11:21
Hmmm... never looked at it from quite that angle.

JD_1947 on 2014-11-07 06:40:16
so an egotist goes into a bar and says . . no not another egotist joke . . .

Ian123 on 2014-11-08 17:38:40
He was such an egotist that he joined the navy so the world could see him.

LLapp on 2015-01-19 12:22:00
Ha!

[ddph]

An event has happened, upon which it is difficult to speak, and impossible to be silent."
— Edmund Burke

montyb on 2014-02-03 10:50:57
OK, I confess. It was I who left the toilet seat up. Sorreeeee!!!

jnoodles on 2014-03-22 13:53:43
wish i'd said that

[ddph]

"Patience is a necessary ingredient of genius. "
— Benjamin Disraeli

dovid1946 on 2014-12-20 03:00:41
Disraeli had a very close relationship with Queen Victoria. When he traveled abroad, she missed him terribly and was known to cry trhoughout the castle- 'Won't you come home, Disraeli, won't you come home'

[ddph]

"When a man fell into his anecdotage it was a sign for him to retire from the world. "
— Benjamin Disraeli

octopunchy on 2012-11-09 15:33:09
That's why I put a fence around my anecdotage...

locodad on 2013-10-29 00:47:24
my anecdotage is bigger than yours.

m1j9s48 on 2014-03-17 12:39:27
What does it look like?I'm getting too old to be falling into my anecdotage.

montyb on 2014-07-06 07:07:09
This reminds me of an anecdote...

jnoodles on 2015-05-15 05:23:43
So long as he doesn't bring up his unclecdotes.

abra on 2015-05-28 10:12:10
I thinkoctopunchy has the right idea. Put a fence around your anecdotage, then you can sit around and tell stories about it.

LLapp on 2016-04-09 11:28:45
"Anecdotage" -- what a great word!

[aerie]

a meeting of Steven Wright's fan club...

"I have the world's largest seashell collection. You may have seen it, I keep it spread out on beaches all over the world."
— Steven Wright


chriscrojam on 2011-02-25 09:35:55
You can't have everything. Where would you put it? - Steven Wright

pootie49 on 2011-05-06 17:37:13
he cracks me up. lol

bgray on 2011-08-20 22:08:38
I saw Steven Wright perform almost 30 years ago, and still remember that evening as one of the funniest of my life!

wvwoman on 2012-11-13 05:58:45
he's a stitch!

Barnabas on 2013-04-27 21:12:40
"I was born caesarian. You can't really tell; except when I leave the house I usually go out the window." - Steven Wright

abra on 2014-07-21 09:05:24
Nothing to do with the quote, but you reminded me of when Adrian Monk said "I was born normally, but I was raised caesarian".

dovid1946 on 2015-04-24 04:12:29
I am trying to figure out why steven Wright is sooo funny, while Jack Handey is sooo unfunny.

JenDiaz72 on 2015-05-12 12:37:46
Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines. - Steven Wright

[wvwoman]

"I love to go to Washington - if only to be near my money. " — Bob Hope

abra on 2015-06-25 10:45:00
I think this quote is one of those that I have done more than any other. I've probably done it a couple dozen times. You'd think I'd be able to set a record, not so. It still took me 24 seconds. Much longer than bansai, or in this case bonsai.

marnita on 2015-09-13 04:57:49
Does anyone know why there is a bonsai as well as a bansai? Are they the same person?

oddcouple on 2015-10-04 01:01:04
I think bansai may have three or four additional accounts just for when he gets bored setting records under one identity

abra on 2016-03-13 08:59:24
When I first started here, I thought that bansai, and bonsai were a couple, maybe even husband and wife.

[ddph]

This one startled my wife when I started laughing

It's important to have a twinkle in your wrinkle."
— Unattributed

Queethebean on 2012-08-10 23:21:26
I do not have that. I do not have a twinkle in my wrinkle. Apparently, it is important that I procure one.

WRQ9 on 2012-11-17 22:38:13
I mistyped and came up with a "twinkie in your winkie", which I did not want.

wvwoman on 2013-03-23 17:27:28
don't be too quick to decide, wrq9---it might make it taste better...(gasp! what did she say??!!)

opallady on 2015-02-18 07:29:26
LOL, you guys!

[ddph]

The years like great black oxen tread the world, and God the herdsman treads them on behind, and I am broken by their passing feet. "
— William Butler Yeats

SineTimor on 2013-11-05 12:42:15
Inspirational

kb83 on 2014-04-30 15:27:09
Yes, just the image one wants when contemplating one's golden years.

[ddph]

You are the product of your own brainstorm."
— Rosemary Konner Steinbaum

bekaboo22 on 2012-07-30 18:43:40
Well now, that's just silly!

montyb on 2013-09-16 09:06:52
I conceived of my own conception?

Quizzical on 2014-05-22 16:00:01
I think she ran out of sensible things to say and kept talking.

abra on 2014-11-08 10:16:45
I just couldn't come up with brainstorm. I had a Y as the last letter, and I stuck with it for a LONG time.

mikehallbackhoe on 2014-12-30 06:51:28
I tried a y and an s for the last letter, it finally took a brainstorm to solve it

larry149 on 2015-06-15 04:07:49
There needs to be a rating category for Stupid Nonsense.

judy100 on 2015-06-28 08:12:25
People can reinvent themselves and with amazing results.

momn8r on 2015-12-16 10:27:18
Barometric pressure dropping over the medulla oblongota! Batten down the grey matter!

badbob on 2015-12-31 04:06:37
brainstory

[opallady]

"A fisherman may measure his catch by the size, but when is a man big enough to keep? "
— Unattributed

opallady on 2009-04-09 02:50:31
Great straight-line, but I'll try to behave and leave it alone.

maradnu on 2009-06-21 01:20:26
Age of consent, dear. Age of consent.

pootie49 on 2010-01-11 14:44:43
Dang it, this is a family site...too bad.

babs on 2010-02-01 04:33:48
Who's doing the fishing in this metaphor? A woman or the "Fisher of Men"? If the former, the quotation is outmodedly sexist, and if the latter, it has non-inclusive language (Jesus is a fisher of women too, presumably). We can forgive non-inclusive language from 18th century writers, but not from contemporary ones...

bansaisequoia on 2010-11-24 05:25:10
Unattributed is a person for all ages.

kb77 on 2011-10-25 12:16:09
whoever said size doesnt matter never went fishing! ;D

tinkastic on 2012-06-01 15:32:20
I like bab's perspective on this. Fish are valued by their size - which reflects their strength, age, life. But we aren't --- this look not to the size, but the worth of the (hu)man to keep as friend, to value.

[universalmom]

Hahaha maradnu - "age of consent!" Brilliant

[LLapp]

"Whatever is well said by another, is mine. " — Seneca

joed on 2013-01-25 16:37:59
Does that mean all of the Seneca quotes need to be attributed to other people? Or is there an argument that the Seneca quotes aren't well said, and therefore are actually his?

montyb on 2013-12-07 07:47:33
Seneca was the Roman precursor to Milton Berle.

[opallady]

"As soon go kindle fire with snow, as seek to quench the fire of love with words."
— William Shakespeare

bvwRedux on 2012-02-16 02:11:19
And yet it hath been done, that snow is melted and stripped by marvelous electrodes into fuel and air -- hydrogen the first, and oxygen the latter -- then kindled easily, so too is lust's sudden flame easily quenched with a blanket of careful words.

oddcouple on 2013-10-27 08:26:14
You know it's difficult when the fastest time is 35 seconds.

abra on 2013-11-04 13:18:18
It was difficult for me. It took me 102 seconds longer than the record. Gryhnd's 35 seconds seems blazingly fast.

LLapp on 2014-09-08 12:30:38
134 seconds and proud of it.

dovid1946 on 2015-05-25 15:36:53
81 seconds and I am happy to be here, since the success rate is only 13.3%

LLapp on 2016-03-26 18:34:40
Holy moly, that comment from bvwRedux is original! It's gorgeous -- makes me want to start a Forum thread, maybe a Comments Hall of Fame. (And by the way, gryhnd's 35-sec. record still stands.)

[LLapp]

Opallady - That comment from bvwReduz was the one that prompted me to start this thread! Definitely a classic of classics.

[universalmom]

Okay, I HAD to add this one! I almost choked with laughter

"A man who exposes himself when he is intoxicated, has not the art of getting drunk. "
— Samuel Johnson

Barnabas on 2012-01-19 15:44:27
I think he was talking about Jim Morrison ;-)

bansaisequoia on 2012-04-04 18:53:24
I heard Jim Morrison would get so drunk, he would whip out his poetry in public! :-)