Classic Comments on the Quote

[wvwoman]

LLapp on 2017-09-21 19:10:57
Ahhhhhh....Danny Kaye singing me to sleep. So glad I stuck around.

My all-time favourite:

"The pellet with the poison's in the flagon with the dragon; the vessel with the pestle has the brew that is true.

i agree--it's a good one!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TJ9f2rnjB84

[wvwoman]

calling JenDiaz re: hungry tortoise!

"There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast."
— Unattributed

montyb on 2012-08-26 03:13:50
Nor on my beagle.

skoogie2 on 2013-08-03 21:19:42
Nor on my daughter's cocker spaniel! She howls like a fire alarm!

oddcouple on 2013-11-11 16:10:43
Garfield?

scamp on 2014-02-23 17:12:01
So true.

universalmom on 2014-05-10 14:23:28
You should see how hard my husband smacks a snooze button...

JenDiaz72 on 2015-01-27 09:23:04
I have tortoise that wakes us up on the weekends if we don't feed her on time.

skeeter on 2015-08-31 10:37:57
Oh, JenDiaz, I just have to ask how the tortoise does that.

Annamariah on 2016-01-09 22:37:38
This quote reminds me of Simon's Cat videos.

Jalapenoman on 2016-01-17 15:26:54
If I kept my pistol in the nightstand, I can't imagine how many times I would have been tempted to use it on my ex-wife's cat.

Jalapenoman on 2016-06-13 14:13:49
Yes there is. It is called throwing the cat out the window.

Lurker on 2017-07-23 11:37:28
Annamariah, I've seen those! My cat whacks me in the face just like Simon's cat when she's hungry for a midnight snack. Only she doesn't act innocent about it afterwards.

abra on 2017-10-29 12:37:37
Waiting for JenDiaz, to come tell us how a tortoise wakes them up. Do tortoises make noises?

[LLapp]

"Whenever you argue with another wiser than yourself in order that others may admire your wisdom, they will discover your ignorance." — Saadi

wvwoman on 2013-04-24 01:18:07
where do they get the 'pictures' of these ancient men?

montyb on 2013-06-12 22:38:56
The ancient men trading card collection.

msswitch on 2014-08-21 05:36:14
This 'picture' is a detail from Saadi in a Rose garden, from a Mughal manuscript of his work Gulistan, c. 1645-- but I like the trading card idea.

[writeon]

Gandolph was on a trading card.

[aerie]

"No passion in the world is equal to the passion to alter someone else's draft."
— H. G. Wells

maradnu on 2010-07-05 19:20:41
Everybody's an editor, everybody's a critic.

bansaisequoia on 2012-10-05 19:23:15
If someone roofies my beer, they've altered my draft.

Allen on 2013-05-22 14:39:24
Close the window, and eliminate the draft!

universalmom on 2016-04-05 06:33:42
Spoken like a true editor!

darkyr on 2016-07-13 06:30:18
In my draft, the part of the editor is played by the late HG Wells. In one scene, his zombified hand reaches out from his grave, red pen in hand, and starts marking up the epitaph on his own headstone.

ednak on 2016-10-08 07:12:35
Truly funny bansa

LLapp on 2017-01-18 03:51:39
darkyr, I will treasure that image!

[aerie]

"Do not protect yourself by a fence, but rather by your friends."
— Czech Proverb


gvkm on 2009-06-17 20:36:28
mY GIRLFRIEND SAYS I'M STUPID

bansaisequoia on 2010-10-27 00:58:47
So dump her.

bansaisequoia on 2011-04-09 18:38:42
Or admit she's right.

cknapp329 on 2011-07-14 12:36:49
or build a fence around her

FaerieWings on 2015-07-11 13:59:54
LOL @cknapp

JJ20paws on 2016-10-28 11:32:49
A sturdy wall (with moat?) works too

abra on 2016-12-19 10:02:51
Oh, it's all so long ago, but I do wonder what gvkm did about the girlfriend who said h was stupid.

maradnu on 2017-06-24 14:52:02
If she was right, he may still be with her.

[montyb]

"The busiest of living agents are certain dead men's thoughts. "
— Christian Nestell Bovee

LLapp on 2016-11-11 15:23:20
Sometimes racing thoughts keep me from sleeping, but I never imagined that dead people had the same problem.

IlLatino on 2016-12-25 03:27:35
Apparently it's harder to stay dead than to get that way.

[LLapp]

Carlyle, dogs, and mowers

"If you do not wish a man to do a thing, you had better get him to talk about it; for the more men talk, the more likely they are to do nothing else." — Thomas Carlyle

montyb on 2012-04-23 14:21:00
Anyone care to discuss this? I have work to avoid.

WRQ9 on 2013-07-22 19:47:13
Lawn mowing is a sort of a collective bonsai tradition, requiring little skill, and plenty of gasoline.

montyb on 2013-09-22 11:27:04
At one time my sister owned four dogs. Mowing her backyard required lots of skillful foot work.

Quizzical on 2015-02-18 14:02:32
What was at one time a lawn mower becomes a fertilizer spreader.

darkyr on 2017-01-27 16:34:30
I have just the one, but from the looks of it when I mow, I would swear he is inviting the neighbor dogs over.

montyb on 2017-06-15 09:11:04
I learned the Fox Trot while mowing.

[ddph]

How a person masters his fate is more important than what his fate is."
— Wilhelm von Humboldt

Lily H on 2015-07-08 17:44:31
LOL! What was I thinking? I had date instead of fate, although it's funnier that way.

montyb on 2016-04-11 10:46:45
I also was mastering my date.

abra on 2016-09-27 08:15:46
As long as your date isn't mastering you.

LLapp on 2017-04-05 12:24:28
For a second I had "masters his cats."

wigoddess on 2017-05-07 07:57:26
LOL... meow!

oddcouple on 2017-09-21 20:27:51
I don't know how anyone could master a cat.

[montyb]

I cannot believe where this one went!

"It is in the treatment of trifles that a person shows what they are. "
— Arthur Schopenhauer

montyb on 2012-03-17 01:25:57
The trifles or the person?

puzzleme on 2013-05-07 12:59:02
Don't trifle with us, monty.

Allen on 2013-07-06 12:45:35
You say trifles, I say truffles. Let's call the whole thing off!

Quizzical on 2014-03-15 10:22:04
From the construction of the verb tense and the plural "they", it would indicate the trifles. I don't think that is what Artie had in mind. An please, someone, get him an aspirin.

ulua on 2014-04-15 02:43:23
Yum, I love a nice chocolate toffee trifle

macmilh on 2014-12-18 02:15:59
Quizzical - an aspirin is a cure for trifles?

Quizzical on 2015-01-09 03:41:08
Maybe the trifles gave him a headache. Chocolate can do that.

kb83 on 2015-06-08 04:17:46
Great comments!

tgreen517 on 2016-04-17 07:19:48
For some reason i am hungry now.

maradnu on 2016-08-18 15:58:29
Who are you calling a triple?

autumngirl on 2017-04-10 15:44:40
a head like that outta hurt!!

Roxanne on 2017-04-13 03:43:34
It's not a headache, it's shame. What he really means to say is "I m-m-made you a stwawbewwy twifle, an', an' a lemon twifle, for your birfday, but I eated dem. Bofe. Sowwy."

[ddph]

"The war between being and nothingness is the underlying illness of the twentieth century. Boredom slays more of existence than war."
— Norman Mailer

montyb on 2012-08-10 23:46:03
Geez, talk about self-promotion for his novels.

JD_1947 on 2014-11-06 14:34:50
I am bored occasionally. Now being one of those times . . .

RustySkipper on 2015-04-26 05:03:45
When you're bored, get a plank.

darkyr on 2017-08-11 04:43:37
And if you're still bored after that, get hammered.

Queethebean on 2017-09-25 10:55:29
You nailed that pun.

MamaB on 2017-10-24 10:51:08
My husband is a punner. And now ya'll. I'm screwed!

[ddph]

"Success is failure turned inside out. "
— Unattributed

BCraig on 2013-03-14 22:49:19
You spelled "Karl Weick" as "Carl".

abra on 2014-01-26 14:02:15
HUH?

LLapp on 2016-03-28 15:01:03
I did not!

maradnu on 2016-11-29 15:15:41
This is almost as useless as a Robert Brault quote

Persephone59 on 2017-07-16 11:56:20
This is just stupid. It is more useless than Brault, and not funny like at least some of Handey's quotes are.

[Persephone59]

I only master my cats for minutes at a time, when I have to toss them into the powder room to go in and out of the house. (Indoor cats).

[ddph]

"I perhaps owe having become a painter to flowers."
— Claude Monet

matarisa on 2011-05-03 01:10:23
And a lovely job he made of it, too.

kokumo on 2011-12-15 20:30:20
Thank you, flowers, for helping to produce one of the greatest painters of all time.

JD_1947 on 2014-11-21 02:12:45
I knew a painter . . he owed it to houses . . .

abra on 2015-03-13 15:21:16
My grandfather was a painter. He did owe it to houses, but he planted lots of flowers.

kb83 on 2016-03-08 10:48:59
Show me the Monet.

badbob on 2016-09-03 23:11:50
you know you're Baroque when you're out of Monet

[ddph]

"Contemplation often makes life miserable. We should act more, think less, and stop watching ourselves live."
— Nicolas Chamfort

tfw on 2013-05-23 03:26:30
So instead maybe we should turn on the tv and watch other people live. This will help with the thinking less too. Then we tell ourselves that we could be an actor.

Beagle on 2014-06-06 08:20:08
And in the other corner... Socrates... with: "The unexamined life is not worth living."

momof7 on 2016-08-01 05:31:50
Stop watching ourselves live??? Give up social media??? Oh , the horror!

maradnu on 2016-12-17 14:12:32
To many people have given up thinking altogether