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  • "Self-worth comes from one thing thinking that you are worthy." Wayne Dyer

    Lurker on January 3rd, 2011
    Ok, who voted for "confusing"?


    • they got together

      "The word aerobics came about when the gym instructors got together and said, "If we're going to charge $10 an hour, we can't call it jumping up and down.""
      Rita Rudner

      DrCryptell on April 1st, 2018
      So then the word "airplane" came about when the pilots got together and said "if we're going to charge $500 a flight we can't call it "winging it."

      skyystorm on July 19th, 2018
      And the doctors got together and said "If we charge 10k a day, we can't call it practicing."


      • and lo, a colon has been added

        "Censor: a self-appointed snoophound who sticks his nose in other people's business."
        Bennett Alfred Cerf

        Lurker on January 6th, 2011
        Perhaps there should be a colon after Censor?

        gryhnd51 on November 25th, 2011
        "censor" the VERB means to remove, suppress, delete, to express disapproval of. In this quote, it is NOT being used as a noun, in which case a colon would be required.

        kb83 on November 14th, 2014
        I vote for noun and a colon.

        maradnu on January 29th, 2015
        Having a colon is handy. I'd hate to be without one.

        montyb on June 19th, 2015
        Some censors are intimately acquainted with their own colons.

        Roxanne on December 31st, 2015
        I bet censor is a noun and the colon is missing. It sounds like Bennett Cerf's style that way, and I doubt he would have urged censoring someone, since he won a big court case against censorship (of James Joyce's Ulysses).

        LLapp on May 23rd, 2016
        ERROR: Please add a colon after "Censor" per the original quote. To verify: (link)

        kb83 on November 30th, 2016
        Okay, admin. A group colonoscopy has determined that the patient needs a colon transplant.


        • "I am incandescent with rage at the idea of horoscopes and of crystals and of the nonsense of 'New Age'."
          Stephen Fry

          skoogie2 on October 9th, 2013
          oooh...incandescent rage! Yikes!

          maradnu on November 3rd, 2013
          Merely petty distractions for those who cannot accept responsibility for their own actions.

          msswitch on May 22nd, 2014
          crystals are excellent for hurling at the heads of those who doubt their powers

          montyb on October 4th, 2014
          The only power crystals have is to fascinate me with their symmetries and beauty. You should see my amethyst-lined geode in my classroom.

          tgreen517 on January 1st, 2015
          unless they are dilitheum chrystals!

          Spenser on February 18th, 2015
          OMG! The digression of geeky references lets me know I have found a home!

          dovid1946 on March 17th, 2015
          someone once asked Steve Allen what sign he was born under ' he said ' Rooms to Rent'

          LLapp on November 14th, 2017
          ^That goes right alongside my father's (though I think he was quoting someone) "If I had my life to live over, I'd live over a delicatessen."

          abra on December 17th, 2017
          I have two Amethyst geodes. Probably much smaller than Monty's. I don't get any spiritual vibes from crystals, but I find them very beautiful.

          DrCryptell on April 19th, 2018
          I'm neon with the idea of cantaloupe, antelope, microscope, heliotrope., endoscope, and jumping rope. Does any of that nonsense light up our lives?


          • Contender for Silliest Wrong Solution

            "Won't you come into the garden? I would like my roses to see you." — Richard Brinsley Sheridan

            locodad on May 15th, 2013
            very nice quote

            puzzleme on June 20th, 2013

            abra on October 25th, 2013

            judy100 on August 22nd, 2014
            How nice

            MatthewReynolds on January 8th, 2016
            For some reason I was hung up with "I would bite my noses to see you."

            abra on May 7th, 2016


            • montyb's comment gave me a good laugh!

              "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. " Unattributed

              Lurker on September 2nd, 2009
              Favorite of Dear Abby's. She may have coined it.

              bansaisequoia on March 12th, 2010
              Gomer Pyle used this one, too.

              countessofmontecrypto on January 8th, 2012
              W tried to.

              montyb on February 5th, 2014
              Fool me 3 times, and welcome to Cryptograms.

              msswitch on May 28th, 2014
              According to the Colonial Williamsburg Journal, a 1786 essay refers to an early, non-English form of the familiar saying 'Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me.' Wrote George Horne, an English divine: 'When a man deceives me once, says the Italian proverb, it is his fault; when twice, it is mine.'

              marnita on October 7th, 2016
              This one has fooled me more than twice.

              maradnu on February 16th, 2018
              Fool me three times and boy am I a schmuck

              mmfs83 on August 8th, 2018
              This one sure fooled me for 356 seconds.


              • "Nature that framed us of four elements, warring within our breasts for regiment, doth teach us all to have aspiring minds. "
                Christopher Marlowe

                puzzleme on June 6th, 2013
                It doth, doth it?

                wvwoman on September 10th, 2013
                or maybe it dothn't!

                JD_1947 on November 9th, 2014
                Could doth tell me what the four elements are . . .?

                LLapp on May 12th, 2015
                Solid, liquid, gas and plasma?

                maradnu on September 7th, 2016
                Fire, earth, air, and water

                BriddlesBob on March 13th, 2017
                And who can help aspiring upon seeing a regiment of breasts?

                Andy451 on June 19th, 2017
                Three nice lines of unrhymed iambic pentameter verse as you will find. Marlowe was a great guy who died way before his time. The novel by Anthony Burgess about him, called A Death in Deptford is a wonderful read.

                kb83 on October 31st, 2017
                I thought maybe carbon, hydrogen, oxygen, and nitrogen.

                MissKitty on March 9th, 2018
                Pizza ,beer .smokes and a Large screen. Kilroy 79


                • "The Creator gave man two ears and one mouth; there is a reason why He did so." Thomas Barron

                  Quizzical on June 4th, 2017
                  Because food is so hard to hear?


                  • Originally posted by LLapp View Post
                    "The Creator gave man two ears and one mouth; there is a reason why He did so." Thomas Barron

                    Quizzical on June 4th, 2017
                    Because food is so hard to hear?
                    now that's a great comment, quizzical!


                    • "We will move forward, we will move upward, and yes, we will move onward." Dan Quayle

                      Elephino on August 14th, 2018
                      It's a new dance craze!


                      • "As a well-spent day brings happy sleep, so a life well spent brings happy death." Leonardo da Vinci

                        chopstix on August 8th, 2014
                        Then he must have had one of the most happy deaths imaginable!

                        Hash on October 24th, 2015
                        My new band's name is going to be "Happy Death".

                        Barnabas on September 19th, 2017
                        "It's my party and I'll die if I want to, die if I want to, die if I want to. You would die too if it happened to you."

                        abra on October 25th, 2017
                        ^ I'm picturing one of those awful horror movies where Johnny and Judy leave at the same time and come back as the walking dead.


                        • "To be a hero or a heroine, one must give an order to oneself."
                          Simone Weil

                          montyb on March 14th, 2012
                          And not be insubordinate.

                          kb83 on February 12th, 2015
                          This really shows hot the best leaders are good followers.

                          LLapp on April 3rd, 2016
                          I am totally insubordinate to my own executive function. If I were self-employed, I would still grouse about my boss.


                          • ten Y's and one S? No problem for skeeter.

                            "The way you think about a fact may defeat you before you ever do anything about it. You are overcome by the fact because you think you are."
                            Norman Vincent Peale

                            montyb on June 7th, 2012
                            Therefore, rely on flights of fancy?

                            montyb on March 23rd, 2014
                            Ten Ys and only one S. There is no way those letter frequencies can occur in the English language. I'll never solve this puzzle.

                            Allen on June 25th, 2014
                            And yet you did.

                            tskaggs6 on November 5th, 2014
                            Am I wrong in thinking he's a prime example of form over function? Can't make up my mind. What do you think?

                            LLapp on March 25th, 2016
                            Clever comments. I like how monty disproves the quote.

                            Persephone59 on April 16th, 2017
                            Personally, I have little use for motivational speakers or religious leaders who don't seem to DO anything but try to advise other people. Thanks, I can figure this out.

                            skeeter on December 1st, 2017
                            Daily you yearn for yesterday yet the memory you will have tomorrow of today may bring more joy.

                            bigdave on April 11th, 2018
                            The comments are the chewy chocolate center of my Cryptogram Tootsie Pop.


                            • "Apothegms are portable wisdom, the quintessential extracts of thought and feelings."
                              R. W. Alger

                              haverwench on June 19th, 2010
                              Now there's a word you don't see every day.

                              irisheyes on October 5th, 2010
                              WHAT is an apothegm?? I thought I had a larger-than-average vocabulary, but I've never seen this one before.

                              bansaisequoia on August 28th, 2011
                              It's a marsupial of the Western Hemisphere.

                              Lurker on August 30th, 2011
                              They carry dictionaries in their pouches.

                              fishbum on February 4th, 2012
                              A short, pithy saying.

                              montyb on May 15th, 2013
                              Boy, am I pithed!

                              wvwoman on July 21st, 2013
                              Synonyms are adage, aphorism, saying, byword, epigram, maxim, proverb, saw

                              abra on August 14th, 2013
                              Ah, so it is an aphorism. I suspected it was.

                              kb83 on August 25th, 2014
                              Rhymes with phlegm. (cough-cough).

                              abra on January 23rd, 2015
                              It doesn't roll off the tongue.

                              Spenser on May 30th, 2015
                              Don't you mean it's a marthupial?

                              QuexUl on March 28th, 2016
                              Whatever they are, they don't seem so very portable to me.

                              figmo on June 11th, 2017
                              Wall-a-by damned!


                              • "It's no good agreeing with a person who can't make up his mind. "

                                eis on January 12th, 2010
                                Unfortunately I usually find that I do so!

                                montyb on May 21st, 2013
                                I agree.

                                maradnu on October 16th, 2013
                                I'm not sure about that. Might be, might not. Let me think about it some more.

                                Allen on April 12th, 2014
                                I agree, Maradnu. Wholeheartedly!

                                toddcmz on August 30th, 2015
                                My approach to marriage might be less good than I thought

                                LLapp on January 20th, 2017
                                I'm with every one of you, one hundred percent.

                                MamaB on September 19th, 2018
                                I'm not. Except maybe t hat one...